The Starter Boyfriend: Part Two

I was you a-typical Evangelical good girl.
In a lot of ways, I still am.

But... I have also grown up a bit in my thoughts and ideas of how life is and should be.

• The thought of waiting to have my first kiss at the altar (something that I once wanted to do) makes me cringe and bust out in laughter.
• The thought of having the only guy I date become my husband seems completely and totally disillusioned.  (Not to say that it can't happen - it has happened to a number of people and works... just not for me.)
• I no longer think that waiting until marriage to have sex is an absolute MUST.
• Now here me out with this... I still hold the same morals and values that I have always held and I still want to wait until I am married to have sex but it won't be the end of the world if it happens before then.
•  The checklist that I had has been ripped up and tossed out the window.

In throwing the checklist out the window, I have tried to date to date... NOT to marry.  This is a new concept when you are fed the buffet of dating advice that I (and many others) was fed going to a Bible College.

I was recently dating someone who couldn't have been more opposite of the checklist that I got rid of.  I did that on purpose.  Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the time we spent together and I liked him.  If I was being completely honest with myself and my friends, I would say that I always knew that it wasn't going to go anywhere.  In fact, I referred to him as "The Starter Boyfriend".  I didn't mean that to be rude or to dismiss who he was or the time we spent together.  I was just being honest.  I wasn't the one for him and he wasn't the one for me and there is nothing wrong with that.

I learned a lot from that Starter Boyfriend.

• I learned to enjoy the moment.
• I learned to be myself - to take pride in who I am and what I have to offer but to not care if what I have to offer or who I am isn't up to par for whomever it is that I am with.
• I learned to let the guy be the guy - let him pay, let him open doors, let him buy you things.
• I learned to let go - if he wants to be with you, he will be with you.
• I learned to be honest - it isn't easy to tell someone that you are a 27 year old virgin, it isn't easy to tell someone that you like him, it isn't easy to tell someone when you are scared, it isn't easy to ask someone not to drink and drive... but all of those things AND MORE needed to be said.
• I learned to not let the opinions of others dictate how I felt or what I thought.

Those are just SOME of the things I learned... and that was a STARTER BOYFRIEND.  Who, wasn't even a "boyfriend".

So... If I can learn all of that AND MORE from a guy that, I never would have given a second thought to a few years ago, and who I dated for just over a month, how much more will I learn from a longer and more substantial relationship?!

Cheers to the next Starter Boyfriend that comes along.